Why I need grace.

Tonight things have come to a head in a way. It has become apparent that I have been dealing with some big issues for years. Or rather, failing to deal with them. I have been trying to be strong and though it out, failing to see that I need support. People have offered but I believed I was in control and could deal with things. I have been under some stress for a while and there are things I need to come to terms with from years ago.


My mum is amazing and has been supporting my dad through some hard times, and she has had support from outside the family. I have tried to be supportive but I now see that supporting someone else takes its toll and leads you to need support. Which, as I said, I haven't been getting.


As I have tried to keep stress contained this has led to me venting frustration at seemingly minor things and at people who are not the cause. I would like to apologize now for all the times I have messed up. I would like to particularly apologize to my mum and dad, David Bass, Alastair Stanley, Matt Oliver, Rob Davidson, Holly Phillips, Lucy Popeski, Sophie Meredith, Emma Best, Joel Forster, Holly Reger, Matt Llewellyn, Paul Oatridge, Rebecca Harris, Mark Mullis & Erik Peeters.


I have been guilty of the arrogance of believing that I was strong enough to get through hard times without help. I need to accept the help of others and above all accept that I need God's grace in my life, as I constantly mess up and on my own I cannot sort it all out.


Sorry everyone.


JM

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